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Tiffany Midge: A new round in America's racist tirade competition

Filed Under: Opinion
More on: humor, racism, tiffany midge
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Poet Tiffany Midge, a member of the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe, comes to you live from a J.C. Penney in Kentucky, where a shopper vies for the title in America's racist rant competition:
Announcer: We’re coming at you live today from JCPenney customer service desk here in Louisville, Kentucky, home to the Kentucky Derby, for the Post-Election U.S. Open in Racist Tirades Competition. Let me introduce the judges; first we have Tommy DeVito. Hello there, Tommy, how are you doing?

Tommy DeVito: Why? Do I amuse you? Am I clown? What exactly are you implying? Am I here for your amusement?

Announcer: Hahahaha, you’re a live wire there, Tommy! And next we have Anne Coulter. Welcome to JCPenney’s Customer Service, Ms. Coulter.

Anne Coulter: It’s Anne, call me Anne. Only my mother calls me Ms. Coulter. Are there hors d’oeuvres? I was told there’d be hors d’oeuvres, I’m starving! I’m so hungry I could eat a live baby. Where are we again? JCPenney. People actually shop here for clothes!? What a shithole, what a dump.

Announcer: I’d like to introduce our final judge Delores Abernathy, who traveled here all the way from Westworld. Hello Delores, thank you for being here today.

Delores Abernathy: [smiles with her lovely eyes] Oh, hello, some folks choose to only see the seedy underbelly of life, I choose to see the splendid panoramic sunsets.

Read More on the Story:
Tiffany Midge: Post-Election U.S. Open in Racist Tirades Competition (Indian Country Today 1/7)


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